I can’t believe that King Josiah approved this project without consulting me first. I’m his chamberlain, his majordomo, his go-to for all household needs! I’ve been serving in his position for twenty years now and I still get no respect. If King Josiah had bothered to check with me I could have told him that gold-plated bathroom tiles were not a good idea and he would have been much better off choosing the obsidian black, given the contrast it would provide with the rest of the house. But once again he has cut me out of the process and now I’m overseeing a mess!
The bathroom renovations company from Melbourne showed up a few hours ago with all of their supplies, ready to get the job done. I hadn’t even been aware of the project. The tiles and taps the king chose look so much worse in person than they would have online. I know that King Josiah is going to hate them, and then he’ll blame me for getting it wrong because he was probably out of his mind when he made the decision. And I can’t even find him and make sure he’s completely certain these are the tiles he wanted, because he’s gone missing again! It really is a pain, living in the second largest mansion in Victoria.
At least we can finally get that shower grout repair we’ve needed for months now. Because King Josiah doesn’t understand what shower grout is, he never approved the repairs. But I’ve asked the renovators to do it anyway, and I’ll make sure they’re fairly compensated. It’ll all be off the books, of course. Wouldn’t want the king to find an unapproved project in the ledgers again.
King Josiah has been talking about how he’d be a better ruler of Victoria than Premier Norris, but I’m not too sure. Yes, with all the heat on the premier, this is certainly the best time to get the 5000 signatures King Josiah needs to become the official monarch of the state, but I hope he doesn’t realise that.